Obstacle? Only if you let it be.

Day 19 of cycle/ 14 days after last Clomid tablet & I have been spotting most of this week, which turned to a heavier bleed (like day one period bleeding) & I've been getting increasingly anxious that the Clomid wasn't agreeing with my body or working, doing it's job.

After talking to K & V listening to what they had to say I rang my Gynecological ward at the hospital & spoke to a nurse who got me to explain the symptoms exactly & then told me that's it's normal with the Clomid to experience this. That the pain I've been having is a good indication of the treatment starting to work. Apparently it's my ovaries being stimulated that's creating the itchy, stabbing pain.

I cannot convey how relieved that phone call made me, how simple an act & yet how long it took me to do it.

I was literally jumping for joy that it doesn't mean the treatment has failed, seeing as I have at least two more months on it & at a higher dose.

Although in saying that the lovely Nurse also said if the bleeding gets any heavier, clots become persistently present or the pain gets too much to just come straight into them but I honestly feel like there's a bit of hope left.

It's normal! I feel somewhat normal even being able to say that. I can handle things easier if I understand the how's & why's of them. But sometimes I get so scared to ask the questions in case the answers negative or it means taking five steps back.

But I have come to the realization that it doesn't matter what the answer is we all eventually have to deal with these outcomes.

It's been really great being able to talk to my younger Sister about all of this. To have a woman's perspective who hasn't gone through any treatments like this or had these nerves about side effects resulting in the treatments not working before. To talk it out, be heard & not compared to for once was just so different that it opened my eyes up to seeing that not everything that happens to my body is necessarily a bad sign.

I have to go into the hospital on Sunday fro my Day 21 Progesterone test so I will just go over everything again, make a list of things I might have forgotten to ask in the first place because I was too scared. See if K has any questions, fears or worries & go forward from here.

It's amazing how a little reassurance can make you instantly feel more positive toward your situation. It's settled me back down in myself a bit, the anxious feeling I had all last night has also eased. I wished I had called earlier or yesterday.

Lesson learned.